Plot Suggestions
Chapter 1: I can't wait to see where this is going. I love whoever thought up the main character and his predicament. I threw in some extra details but didn't really push the plot forward very far. I kept all the plot points and details from whoever wrote before me, including the parapet, I just slowed it down so we could draw out the suspense and add more atmospheric details. --Anne
Overall this is a great story, but the chapters are really short. Slow down and enjoy each and every chapter! That's just my advice. :0) -- Enna Isilee
Right about slowing down, Enna Isilee. Changes I just made to Chapter 4 are primarily to give a better sense of time. I also didn't see a need to keep the reader in suspense as to what Finkel saw -- I think we already knew from Chapter 3. As we move forward to Chapters 5 and beyond, let's not be afraid to enrich text in the other chapters! - (Jim D)